Is Your Money Prepared for the New Season?

Summer is coming to a close. Every year you prepare yourself for cooler temperatures, getting children ready for school, school buses on the road, and to rake leaves and warm the car in the mornings. As you prepare for the changes to your routine you also need to get your money prepared for new expenses and do a financial fitness check up.

1) Check your home. Check the insulation on windows and doors. No or insufficient insulation will allow heat to escape and your heating bill to climb unnecessarily. Can we say major money leak. Also check the insulation in the walls of your home, that is important to trap the heat too. If you're renting have your landlord do a check. I once had two months of a $300 gas and electric bill. The culprit? A living room window was cracked at the top and was letting my heat escape. If you see a crazy jump, something is wrong, start checking.

2) Do a financial check up. There are several things that would be good to check during this time. Do at least these three.

Net worth. You've been steadily working on growing your money for several months. Calculate your net worth to see how you're doing. Is the number a little bigger? If so you're moving in the right direction.

Spending plan. How well is your spending plan working? Determine if you need to shift your plan, such as increasing or decreasing target amounts for specific categories. Did you plug all money leaks? Perhaps you decided to keep a subscription when you made the plan, but looking back realize you really haven't been using it. Well then cancel it, cut it from the plan and shift the money towards something else. Put the money towards a category you're struggling with sticking to the allotted amount, savings, paying down debt or investments.

How much closer are you to your goals? The numbers will show if you're making progress towards your goal. Are you on track to complete your goal by the deadline that you set. If not what can you adjust to stay on track.

3) Shop smart. We know the best times to purchase clothes is at the end of a season when there are big discounts as stores prepare for the change in inventory for the new season. However, if it is unavoidable and you have to buy new fall gear for yourself or family members try this. Shop at thrift stores and discount chains. You'll be able to find cool new things at a much lower cost. Many times there will be items with the tags still on them. You just have to dig around a bit. Look for online deals and coupons. Don't use your credit card. I repeat don't use your credit card. 

About the author:

About the author: Maria James has a compassion for people that makes her involvement in Heal a Woman to Heal a Nation a sure fit. She is a biomedical scientist who is public health conscience and has always worked for the betterment of others. Maria is the founder of Pocket of Money, LLC which provides tools and tips to help you take control of your money and live your best life. Dr. James is our resident Money Scientist.

Vulnerability is my Greatest Superpower

Super Truth: Vulnerability is my greatest superpower.

I have done a lot of really cool stuff over the years. Things I am proud of because they were not easy...but I attempted them anyway! Sometimes I succeeded. Sometimes I failed.

I used to think I needed to do these things because people would listen to me if I had accomplished enough. That being a doer, a go-getter, and having mental toughness would be the superpowers that would take me straight to the top. It felt easy to imagine standing on my story of being the girl who graduated from West Point, flew helicopters, completed a half-ironman, rolled out of bed and ran a 50K race one day, etc, etc...

After all, don't we get hired because of all the fabulous things on our resumes & the achievements we have under our belts? Isn't THAT what impresses people & makes them love us?

What I've discovered in the last few years is that not one of those big, bad challenges was as scary as learning how to demonstrate another superpower. Vulnerability.

Years ago I would have rather run a marathon or ruck march up the side of a mountain than display what I considered to be weakness by sharing my fears. By sniveling about what I'd overcome in the past.

Whaaaa. Poor me. Why bother others with my sob stories? After all, I had learned to suck it up & drive on...wouldn't most people rather hear about my results than my breakdowns?!

In a word, no.

What I have discovered has been surprising and a bit of a relief. People actually love and appreciate me for my failures just as much, if not more, as they love me for my successes. My faults are not liabilities...they are my humanity. And my wins become boring if that is all I ever share. People tune out. No one on the planet bounces from success to success to success...and so it's hard to get inspiration from those who talk about nothing but all the things they've done right.

I remember one particular evening when a friend & I decided to play a little game we like to call "vulnerability chicken." We decided to share our deepest, darkest secrets in service of creating a closer connection. To share the things we never said out loud to other people because we were SURE saying them would lead to the certain death of the friendship. Our mistakes. Our regrets. The things that still haunt us in those silent moments when we get a little too inside our heads.

I remember telling him something I felt was so horrible and embarrassing. I could barely look him in the eyes when I said it.

And then I waited.

Much to my surprise, instead of judgement, I was met with compassion & acceptance. And then my friend opened up about some of his own personal battles...which made me love him even more. In fact, I couldn't believe he'd been holding in these things he called deep, dark secrets. To me they felt like the same kind of mistakes we all make navigating life.

I think that night was truly the first night I stopped holding my breath. Stopped wondering when my mistakes would catch up with me & my flaws would cost me a friendship. It was the night I learned sharing these parts of my journey are not only healing for me...but for others who may need reassurance as well. And that people don't love me in spite of my mistakes...they actually love me more because of them.

That kind of acceptance was the best feeling I had ever had. And I knew that if I could be that accepting of everyone I met (because don't many of us fear that "if people only knew ______, there's no way they would accept me?!"), I would be giving people the greatest gift I ever could.

So from the bottom of my heart, because my friend showed me so much compassion & understanding in my imperfections, I want you to know that you are amazing. Exactly. As. You. Are.

I see you. I appreciate you. And I thank you for being my friend.

About the author: Leslie has more than a dozen years of leadership, process efficiency, behavioral analysis, professional facilitation and training experience in a number of challenging environments. Her experience includes seven years in the U.S. Army, work in membership sales, television news production and in non-profit and association communities. She is sought-after as a professional facilitator and facilitation trainer. Leslie’s work through Lead Like A Girl focuses on inspiring groups and individuals to look for new perspectives when the ones they’re stuck in just aren’t working anymore, using their own brilliance & untapped superpowers to improve communication and enhance success. Leslie calls herself a “Life Enthusiast” because if there’s a challenge most people don’t want to tackle…she’ll give it a try. From flying Chinook helicopters in the Army, to completing her first half-ironman to taking lessons on the flying trapeze, Leslie doesn’t know the meaning of the words, “I can’t.” And she will make sure you forget those words too!Connect with Leslie at http://www.lesliestein.com/blog

This is It! Don't Rehearse

Have you heard the saying, how you do one thing is how you do everything? A friend of mine shared it with me this past week and then it popped up in O magazine. Serendipity! The phrase also reminds me of what my high school tennis coach used to say to me. How you practice is how you play.  During my two year career on the tennis court, this saying made me realize when I wasn’t practicing with my all. I would run slower if I was tired or stopped short on a swing instead of carrying it through and sure enough I would do the same thing when it came to a game. I finally got tired of losing and I knew I need to do something different. 

Either I wasn’t good enough or I wasn’t giving it my all. How often do we decide that “this” doesn’t work only to realize that it would if we did it to the best of our ability? I decided to practice with my all.  It was brutal. Nothing about playing tennis or any sport came easy to me. However, that final year, all my sweat equity paid off. I earned a gold medal in Doubles and bronze in Singles. Not bad for a girl who almost failed gym. I just remember thinking, “this is it”. What made the difference wasn’t just how I played the game, but how I practiced for each game. Fast forward a decade, quickly becoming two but who’s counting, and I’m witnessing the lesson come to life again.

What would happen if every day you showed up as if This Is It? 

Michael Jackson is one of the greatest entertainers of the last century.  This would be difficult for anyone to dispute.  Recently, I was watching a clip of Judith Hill and Michael Jackson from his This is It tour which we know never saw one concert performance due to Michael’s passing. Okay, so I wasn’t actually watching the clip at first. I was at my computer working on this newsletter as a matter of fact and the song “I can’t Stop Loving You” began after I listened to another of Hill’s songs on YouTube. I’m thinking that sounds like Michael Jackson, totally forgetting about the duet she was schedule to perform with the King of Pop. I looked at the video and it was at the moment when the camera panned the audience of about oh… 13 people.  The clip is from a rehearsal for the This Is It tour. In the large stadium to witness the magic was only the band, backup dancers and critical staff, but they’re performance was worth of a sold out show to thousands. It wasn’t perfect but seriously it was darn good. You could see Michael giving Judith instructions and even singing out instructions to the band. Uhm… could you have someone recorded your practice and it be nearly as perfect as the live show? I mean seriously, what would happen if we showed up each day as if this is the show not a dress rehearsal?

We have to live life one day at a time. We don’t have any other choice. And factually nothing is guaranteed. Michael didn’t know that we’d never see the live concert but his dedication to his craft showed u,p even in during practice time. The day before your life changes is like any other day.

So whether we’re working to start a business, play an instrument, perform in an arena, jump start a career or even a build a family, every day we should work to build our lives. You’re the boss. You are the Chief Experience Officer (hey I kinda like that) of your existence and we have to show up knowing that this is it. It won’t always be easy. Yet, shoot for the stars. Repeat what works until you get it perfect. Ask for what you need, when you need help (even Michael had a coach). Reinvent yourself when necessary. However, whatever you focus your life on.   

Don’t rehearse! Always show up and play full out! This is it. 

About the author: Sister Mothyna James-Brightful is a self-proclaimed “Self Love Revolutionary”. She has spent the last decade empowering women and girls to live authentic lives as the Visionary Director and Co-founder of Heal a Woman to Heal a Nation. Sister Mothyna is co-author of Because I am a Queen...100 Affirmations for Daily Living and is currently working on her forth coming book Engage.Inspire. Prevent: Tips to Educating Teens on Sexual Violence. Stay connected www.hwhn.org: Twitter @mothyna

Three Feet from Gold

Excerpt from THINK AND GROW RICH by NAPOLEON HILL

THREE FEET FROM GOLD

One of the most common causes of failure is the habit of quitting when one is overtaken by temporary defeat. Every person is guilty of this mistake at one time or another. An uncle of R. U. Darby was caught by the "gold fever" in the gold rush days, and went west to DIG AND GROW RICH. He had never heard that more gold has been mined from the brains of men than has ever been taken from the earth. He staked a claim and went to work with pick and shovel. The going was hard, but his lust for gold was definite.

After weeks of labor, he was rewarded by the discovery of the shining ore. He needed machinery to bring the ore to the surface. Quietly, he covered up the mine, retraced his footsteps to his home in Williamsburg, Maryland, told his relatives and a few neighbors of the "strike." They got together money for the needed machinery, had it shipped. The uncle and Darby went back to work the mine.

The first car of ore was mined, and shipped to a smelter. The returns proved they had one of the richest mines in Colorado! A few more cars of that ore would clear the debts. Then would come the big killing in profits.

Down went the drills! Up went the hopes of Darby and Uncle! Then something happened! The vein of gold ore disappeared! They had come to the end of the rainbow, and the pot of gold was no longer there! They drilled on, desperately trying to pick up the vein again-all to no avail.

Finally, they decided to QUIT. They sold the machinery to a junk man for a few hundred dollars, and took the train back home. Some "junk" men are dumb, but not this one! He called in a mining engineer to look at the mine and do a little calculating. The engineer advised that the project had failed, because the owners were not familiar with "fault lines." His calculations showed that the vein would be found JUST THREE FEET FROM WHERE THE DARBYS HAD STOPPED DRILLING! That is exactly where it was found!

The "Junk" man took millions of dollars in ore from the mine, because he knew enough to seek expert counsel before giving up. Most of the money which went into the machinery was procured through the efforts of R. U. Darby, who was then a very young man. The money came from his relatives and neighbors, because of their faith in him. He paid back every dollar of it, although he was years in doing so.

Long afterward, Mr. Darby recouped his loss many times over, when he made the discovery that DESIRE can be transmuted into gold. The discovery came after he went into the business of selling life insurance.

Remembering that he lost a huge fortune, because he STOPPED three feet from gold, Darby profited by the experience in his chosen work, by the simple method of saying to himself, "I stopped three feet from gold, but I will never stop because men say v no' when I ask them to buy insurance."

Darby is one of a small group of fewer than fifty men who sell more than a million dollars in life insurance annually. He owes his "stickability" to the lesson he learned from his "quitability" in the gold mining business.

Before success comes in any man's life, he is sure to meet with much temporary defeat, and, perhaps, some failure. When defeat overtakes a man, the easiest and most logical thing to do is to QUIT. That is exactly what the majority of men do.

More than five hundred of the most successful men this country has ever known, told the author their greatest success came just one step beyond the point at which defeat had overtaken them. Failure is a trickster with a keen sense of irony and cunning.

It takes great delight in tripping one when success is almost within reach.