Now that we are near the end of 2015, the holiday season is quickly approaching. For many of us, traveling, cooking holiday feasts, purchasing gifts, and hosting family gatherings are just a few of the tasks we add on to our never ending “to-do” lists. As women, the constant demand to show up strong in the work place and to care for our loved ones often leaves us with little time or opportunity to implement self-care. According to a national study done by the Center for Talent Innovation in 2014, “Black Women are twice as likely as white women to be leaders in their communities.” The skills that many of us naturally develop such as multi-tasking and organizing, extend beyond the four walls of our homes and into the roles we play within our churches, schools, and community organizations. By practicing and refining such skills, Black women have also become “the fastest growing group of business owners in America.” Yet despite all of these amazing accomplishments, when it comes to health, we persistently lag far behind. As we continue to excel, our health must become a valued part of our climb to personal growth and success. Our lives depend upon it.
1. Our Physical Health
I’m sure that everyone gets tired of hearing about obesity, breast cancer, and heart disease. Well, maybe we are not tired enough because Black women continue to rank close to if not the highest in all of them. Having a yearly physical, eye exam, and bi-annual dental cleaning are recommended standard minimums. When was the last time you did the aforementioned? Where do they rank on your “to-do” list? Exercise and healthy eating habits must become a routine part of our lives. I joined and quit a gym 3 times before finally discovering that yoga and jogging in nature were my favorite fitness activities. Now, they are a regular part of my routine that I look forward to. National organization Black Girls Run serves as a great resource to enjoy group fitness, if flying solo is not your cup of tea. Some of my girlfriends prefer YouTube as their go to place for fitness routines that can be done in the privacy and comfort of their homes. Black Women Losing Weight and Black Girl’s Guide to Weight Loss are great online motivational tools with countless tips. For healthy cooking and eating, nutritionists “Wendy & Jess” are my favorite! I’ve made so many tasty smoothies and savory meals using their recipes.
Many of us are on the road to better health and we don’t have to take the journey alone. We did not get to this current state alone. Illnesses such as diabetes and hypertension which are very common in Blacks, are related not only to our habits but to our genetics as well. Do you know your family health history and risks? If you are fortunate enough to spend time with family elders this holiday season, bring back more than a homemade pie and cute pictures to post on social media. Ask about your family history and ailments if possible. Most elders love telling stories and what you discover may be more valuable than you could have ever imagined.
2. Our Sexual Health
“I knew something didn’t feel right,” is a statement I hear far too often when performing nursing admissions on newly diagnosed HIV+ clients in my clinic. Black women account for more than “60% of new HIV infections among all women nationwide.” Most of these infections occur from heterosexual contact. Latex condoms are the best form of protection. African Americans as a whole are more likely to die from AIDS, because we enter into care and begin treatment at a much later stage in the disease process versus other demographics. It is important for all sexually active women to have annual STD screenings (including HIV, syphilis, gonorrhea, and chlamydia). Encourage your sexual partner(s) to get tested. Routine pap smears, pre-natal care, “birth control” concerns, breast exams and mammogram referrals can all be done during an OBGYN visit. Make time to schedule a well women’s check up for yourself. If you don’t have a regular OB, do some research and ask around to find one.
3. Emotional & Mental Health
I love that I can YouTube the latest makeup and hair tutorials. We have the art of contouring and bringing out our best features down to a science. Unfortunately, sometimes we pay so much attention to our physical beauty that we “totally mask and ignore our inner being.” The ending of a very traumatic romantic relationship and relocating 1000 miles away from family became the driving forces that pushed me into going to counseling once a month. It has become a vital part of my self-love practice and a positive personal coping mechanism. So many of us have experienced intergenerational trauma, emotional and physical abuse, parental abandonment, and grief caused by the unexpected or traumatic loss of a child or loved one. We deal with all of this, on top of the pressure of being marginalized due to various forms of racism. If we do not acknowledge and work to heal our traumas, eventually they will take a toll on us. For many of us they already have, as these traumas transform into unhealthy adaptive patterns that bind us and end up being modeled to our children. I encourage you to find a trusted counselor, spiritual supporter or friend with whom you can share and relieve your pain. If voicing your truth to someone else is too painful at this time, purchase a journal and pen and spend time writing. There are tons of books that serve as guides for self-exploration.
4. Our Spiritual & Financial Health
Our Spiritual and financial health are also important parts of our lives that we must maintain. For more details in those areas I encourage you to research and follow my fellow HWHN sisters Ms. Tiffany Bethea founder of “SHE-EO Life” and Dr. Maria James, founder of “Pocket of Money, LLC”. They are experts in their fields and have tons of valuable resources to support your growth in these areas.
The pressure that accompanies being a matriarch and leader, emotional distress, and physical neglect can all cause great stress in our lives. Externally we play the role of the fierce unstoppable superwoman, but internally this pattern is “wearing us down.” We have the power to create a healthier and “more loving path for ourselves.” Let the abbreviated inventory listed above serve as a small guide for you to jumpstart your 2016 plan of self-care. I hope that you find some of the resources useful. I hope that you choose to place your health and self-care as priorities on your list. The fulfillment of our purpose and the well being of our children and communities depend upon it. Only when we are whole, healthy and fully invested in ourselves will we be able to fully stand in our power and show up for everyone and everything else in our lives. I am petitioning all of us to give ourselves the gift of health. I’m wishing all of my sisters a happy, healthy and amazing holiday season this year.
Jamilla Webb, RN, BSN is a native of Washington, DC. She relocated to New Orleans, LA in 2011. Her work in the field of HIV and Infectious Disease began at Children’s National Medical Center, in 2007 in DC. She currently supports underserved populations as a Public Health Nurse with NO AIDS Task Force. Since 2008, she has hosted free community health forums and continues this form of outreach today. She proudly represents her agency at various health events throughout the city, serves women as a birth doula with Birthmark Doula Collective, and recently returned to the U.S. from her first medical mission trip in Zambia.
She received her Associates of Science in Nursing from Prince George’s Community College in Largo, MD and her Bachelors of Science in Nursing from Louisiana State University Health Sciences Center in New Orleans, LA. She believes everyone was born with a special purpose and gift to offer the world. Nursing is her life purpose and she intends to continue using her it as a vessel to learn, grow, travel and be of service to others.
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